Answering the Call of Ayahuasca
I first visited Peru in January 2012, traveling with my mom to see some of the Incan ruins and visit Machu Picchu on a short girls’ trip. After she returned to the States, my cousin flew in from Virginia and we spent another week in Cusco, drinking in “the world’s highest Irish bar” and playing beer pong with our hostel mates until 3am. It was the beginning of a very belligerent backpacking trip through South America.
Fast forward four years to January 2016, when I’m hiking in New Zealand (again with my mom) and all of sudden hear a voice in my head telling me to go back to Peru. I heard it and quickly dismissed it - I was in New Zealand! Peru just came out of left field and I wanted to remain present in my Kiwi adventure. Over the next few days of hiking the Milford Track, that same voice became stronger and more frequent. I began receiving all sorts of signs about going to Peru -a fellow hiker wearing a Peru jersey, a traveler offering me a banana imported from Peru, and many other random occurrences. I thought to myself, “What? Peru? But I’m in New Zealand! Why does Peru keep coming up? I've already been to Peru!”
Turns out I had been to Peru, but I hadn’t really experienced Peru.
It would take me another 11 months and a one-way ticket before I found out why.
Two months after the signs began, I had floated from New Zealand to Thailand for a wedding. Though the celebration wasn’t at all like your typical "throw the bouquet" or "jump up and shout now" kind of reception, it was more of a music and dance festival for spiritual partiers. The guest list was an international roster of yoga teachers, healers, tantra masters, acupuncturists, unicorns and mermaids (seriously) - all in some way involved with holistic living, soul searching and cosmic curiosity. On the first day of the wedding week, I met an incredibly soulful, spiritually wise man who had just arrived from Peru. We had a deep connection from the moment we met and I was curious to listen to him.
It was in conversation with him and this community of cosmic nomads that I first heard about Ayahuasca, a vine from the Amazon that fosters healing: mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. I was intrigued.
Sure, I had heard of plant based diets and eating raw, but I had never heard of plant medicine. As it began coming up more frequently in tales of traveling, I made a quick assumption it was just another psychedelic like LSD or mushrooms, based on the detailed descriptions of visuals that everyone had been giving. Though there was something different about the way people talked about the ingestion of this “medicine." Those sharing their experiences seemed to hold it with high respect, mentioning how heart opening it had been for them and how much it had changed their lives. I was slowly cluing in that even though it’s a psychedelic, it was certainly not considered a drug. I took a look around the circle of the people who were describing their experience with “Grandmother” and all of a sudden noticed their energy of unity and profound connection with the Earth and each other; a powerful vibration of groundedness and oneness held the space over these soul searchers. They all were deeply exploring a realm of self study - facing fears and seeking self mastery; what seemed like many levels beyond that of the typical downward-dog enthusiast.
I had only been on the spiritual path for a little over a year and I was like a puppy - curious, clumsy, excited and wanting to sniff out everything - all the tools available for growth and expansion. These beings seemed to exist in a deeper level of which I had not yet experienced. Was it a matter of meditating more often? Did they eat cleaner than I did? Maybe it was a different kind of yoga? What have they done to reach such self understanding that I had not yet found? My automatic western-world thinking of “I want it and I want it now” had me completely missing the journey and focusing more on the destination. I was reminded to sit back and allow it all to unfold organically, because rushing it would do the opposite and intrinsically hold me back if my intention was to get there faster.
Over the next six months I continued to get signs and no matter where I was in the world, I was receiving messages about returning to Peru. Simultaneously, I was hearing more and more about Ayahuasca and plant medicine, becoming increasingly curious and feeling a deep pull from her, but not linking the two signs that were being delivered to me synchronistically. After months of patience and listening, I looked at my calendar and found a month of free time.
I listened to the voice that had been speaking to me over and over again; I gave in the to the signs and agreed with my gut telling me to go. I ended up buying a ticket to Cusco, but had no idea why. I sent a message to my friend with whom I created a deep connection in Thailand and said “OK, I bought my ticket to Peru, but I have no idea what I'm going to do when I get there, I've already been there." And that's when he laid out exactly what I was going to do. Knowing that our connection was not coincidence, he had been waiting for me to commit to the signs before he was going to divulge the next clue of why I was going to Peru. He said, “You're going to journey with the mother. She's been calling you. And it's going to change your life.”
A few weeks later, I found myself sitting in a temple in Sacred Valley, listening to the stories of 15 others who were there to journey together in search of answers and in search of self.
